


Maybe He Is

by RedLlamas



Category: The Deer Hunter
Genre: Gay Panic, M/M, Poetry, Swear Words, Vietnam War, gay revelation, the f word is used multiple times I'm sorry for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-29 19:11:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13933446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedLlamas/pseuds/RedLlamas
Summary: Mike reflects on his ... relationship with Nick.





	Maybe He Is

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the movie and absolutely fell in love with their relationship, so I wanted to explore Mike's side

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Maybe the reason why he’s never gone on any dates  
With any of the girls Stosh tries to set him up with  
Was because he didn’t want to be with them  
(He had to admit, he’d been wanting to be with a pretty blond for a while, though).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Maybe the reason why he went after Linda,  
After all this time and after so much time,  
Was because if he kissed her,  
He could taste the last lips that have been on hers  
(He could also smell him, touch her where his hands had been. She was full of memories of him).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Maybe the reason why he only trusted Nick  
When they went hunting was not only because  
Nick was actually a good shot,  
But because he truly wouldn’t want to be with  
Anyone else.  
(Nick understands the quiet he needs, the tranquility. Mike starts to believe that Nick is his tranquility).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Maybe the reason why he was singing along with Nick to the Four Seasons was  
Because Nick looked so happy, and it was his favorite song,  
And Mike would do anything to  
Bring a smile to his face  
(He wouldn’t know what could happen if it were just them singing in the bar. Maybe they wouldn’t be sitting so far apart).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Maybe the reason why the only moment of peace and happiness  
He’s had while he’s been in ‘Nam  
Was when he first heard Nick’s soft voice calling out to him  
(He feels bad for thinking that Steven was a bother. They were in a war, there wasn’t any time for bothers or pleasures).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
While they waited underneath the wooden shack, Mike couldn’t get as close to Nick  
As he wanted. None of the soldiers would’ve  
Said anything.  
Hell, any of them would have wanted a gentle touch  
Instead of the guns and slaps they received by the hour.  
Steven was breaking apart while Nick was cool,  
And Mike found himself saving both in the end.  
(Afterwards, he found Nick at the roulette den. He couldn’t reach him in time,  
And lost him to the jungle again).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
When he came back home, Linda said she hadn’t heard about Nick  
Or Steven. Mike felt blood rush in his ears, and  
He set out to Angela’s.  
(Steven is fine, but Nick is still lost).  
(He wants to die, but instead, he falls asleep on a motel bed with Linda  
By his side).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Hunting without Nick, he feels lost and naked.  
His friends are kind, but they don’t know  
How the quiet  
Is part  
Of the hunting.  
(Stosh has a gun. Stosh doesn’t have a gun anymore).

Maybe he is a faggot.  
Mike brings Steven back home, and when Steven says he keeps on  
Receiving money,  
Mike makes a plan to go back for  
Nick.

But Nick has gone, and now a shell is in his place.  
And Mike is trying to reach out to him,  
Try to get him to remember their times  
Out together.

Nick remembers that multiple shots  
Are for cowards,  
So he only takes one.  
But he doesn’t know  
That it was two lives  
That were killed  
Instead of one.

Now Mike is crying in the bar,  
After the funeral,  
And he thinks to himself,  
“Maybe I am a faggot.”


End file.
